Let me tell you a story about the rise and fall of my self esteem
I think most guys look at porn as a fallback career. I mean I know I do.
life lesson# 3: saying thank you on a subway really means "im not a native new yorker, so please feel free to touch my ass"
hmm. interesting. explain how you came across this knowledge.
i sneezed. he said bless you. i said thank you. he groped. i again said thank you.
how come everytime i call mom shes doing tequila shots
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I find it ironic that im starting my birth control on mothers day.
He literally didn't stop until I lost count of how many times he made me orgasm. It took three hours.
We'll probably be arrested for having a cheetah in our apartment anyway, so I say go for it.
For your information i will be shotgunning whiskey on may 21st.
Showering in my swimsuit in hopes of getting the beer smell out.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
apparently dick flashing is a frowned upon sport here..... sorry girlfriends mom
Its Nebraska, I'm sure im not the first person to wake up hungover in a corn field.
Go for it! You're young. Have fun. Be somebody's expensive hobby like Anastasia Steele.
You know you're fucked up when you decide to pour fireball whiskey in your vegetable beef soup
After last night I think its official. Deep down, we like alcohol more than we like women.
Cleaned the whole house at 7:30 and after cleaning the bathroom I think I had cocaine on my sweatpants
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