I would go down on you faster than GM stock
he asked if he could put his cape on while he was still inside me.
I wore a leash I'll tell you about it later I had a fantastic time
Just rented the SCUBA equipment. Meet me at the pool to test the underwater beer bong idea.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He kissed my hand AND my forehead. I don't think this virginity business is for heartless whores like us.
So I hooked up with a guy with a mustache and woke up on a dragon futon underneath a dragon yin-tang tapestry... My life is spiraling in a weird way.
Its a first. Never been peed on in a line to concert. First time for everything.
She kept telling me it was a squirtgun.
you kept saying how you wanted to mainline bacardi right into your bloodstream. medical school is doing wonderful things to your brain
I just got dropped off by that cop that pulled you over. Best sex ever! Consider that $140 ticket my birthday present.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I feel like it could help stop wars and begin world peace and the continents can unite for one Monday because chicken fries come back today
especially when i'm drunk. his dick might as well be made of cotton candy.
So how does one go about leaving their family vacation to hang out with someone they met on tinder
Someone keeps hanging up bible verse posters in the bathroom stall I masturbate in at work.
Did I see you at the bar last night?
Yes. You just kept grabbing my boobs and saying how much better they are than yours...
I went to a swingers party and came home with a boyfriend. I love my life.
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