If God's watching us, we might as well be entertaining
Of course my walk of shame coincided with the alumni marathon on campus. But, I did get a thumbs up from the woman handing out water.
Biggest penis I've ever pity fucked
Because of him my new motto is "Keep calm and fuck a guy with a beard". Yes, I am serious.
there's a photo set of like seven dicks covered in glitter....i don't know what to do
My ideal friend would be my dog as a drug dealer
So much rum. So many feels.
I'm going to pretend you don't watch My Little Pony and focus on your large cock. Kay? Don't bring it up again.
well. can officially check "get caught having sex on the front porch by the neighbors" off the bucket list.
Remember that whole "don't let me drink" thing? We should really start sticking to that.
your penis is a great and majestic leader among the penises.
I think I must have activated my bat signal.... All three of my FWBs contacted me today!
You can't just drop that I might be walking into a foursome and leave it at that
You're a problem for me, dick game too good. In the future when I'm with someone I actually wanna to date, now I'm gonna compare.
Just found out a shooting happened in our parking lot while it was closed this morning. So thaaaaaaaaats fun.
Randomize
