Why do girls always cry at the bar?
What's the point of going out if you're going to cry all night?
Are they having an exestensial crisis at the bar?
i've decided that sluttiness is like a disease, it can lay dormant in you for years and then one day you go to college and with all the booze and drugs and boys and time on your hands symptoms begin to show then one day BAM you're a huge slut. it's like how izzie had skin cancer and it grew into brain cancer.
his penis looked like arnold from hey arnold. it was interesting.
her nose should be used as a dorsal fin
9 am. shotgunning while conditioning my hair. i love college football season.
you kept lying down on the floor at the bar just to prove you could get back up
the 24 hour champagne diet aint going so well
We gave a starfish gin and Lucky Charms. I think it enjoyed it. Best trip to the beach ever.
why oh why did i suck thise tits. nothing but trouble fuuuuuu
I would of joined had I not blacked out last night and ran around naked breaking things till 4 am
I'm pretty sure the Jahovah's witness only came to our door because the front says "Twerk Or Treat"
Being able to fart in my own house is like 90% of why I pay rent
I found the crust to my pizza under my covers that's cool
You gave me a bottle of tequila and introduced me to a ginger named cowboy. I actually love you.
Only great wives bring your dope to you when you are at the Cardiologist
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