did you make any bad decisions?
many, i pretty much fell in love with a freshman...it doesn't get much better than that
I just found 22 drunken videos and 4 naked pictures on my phone. We'll start the bidding at $5
shit I'm tired of wearing other peoples clothes to bed
I just saw a dude get out of an ambulance with nothing but wallabees on
I hate girls that dress up to come to planned parenthood. I just want to be like we are all in the same boat here, we know your slutty. Its OK.
all her text said was "asdfhdaufhudshfuds" and i knew that meant come over
The only thing worse than listening to you two fuck all night was waking up and smelling bacon and there not being any left.
I feel if a girl leaves my house the next morning feeling degraded and in desparate need of a shower, then I have succeeded.
Wish i knew who the f is sending me pics of asian newborns.
You know you need to take better care of yourself when shaving reminds you of sheep shearing...
I think I just legit sprained my wrist from holding myself up while giving a blow J. God dammit come already
If I ever go to jail it will be because of you, I can feel it.
I thought he was foreign, but it turns out when you're that drunk, an Ohio accent just sounds Russian.
He tried to get me to go back to his place on the condition that he has 6 cats. I was very tempted but I said no. Hoping to go see the cats tomorrow
I'll tell you all about it in person but let's just say the big dick fairy must really like me right now
Randomize
