It's one of the reasons i'm here, along with emotional support, physical support if you need it, and power orgasms.
no. i just ate a whole thing of hot dogs. me and regret are sleepng alone tonigh.
Just saw the first guy I gave head to lose in the french open...some how I feel better that my mistake made it to the same mistake as our relationship, the third round. Don't judge.
He said he wanted to have kids with me so they could grow up to be professional linebackers. Not. A. Complient.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Mmmhmmm sure, nice try, but there's certain wounds that only bj's can heal
When that rick ross song came on he started ripping up dollar bills and pouring out drinks on the floor. I'm all for ignorance but it was a little excessive for a wedding
I was rolling balls and tried to donate blood as an act of kindness to the sick person who would receive it
She wants to go as a facebook "like" for halloween, but right now her costume looks more like the hamburger helper hand with broken fingers.
You kept saying you only wanted to drink until you were sleepy. You succeeded if "sleepy" means you sleepied around with 4/6 of the guys there.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
passed out in the hallway last night, now I'm sitting down in the shower, eating lukewarm canned soup out of Tupperware, listening to Carly rae jepsen.. I had a rough night.
You called me into the kitchen so you could show me that you were peeing in the kitchen sink and then told me to leave bc you couldn't do it with me watching
I told him I was ready for another round and he said, "after this part." What guy chooses James Bond over pussy?!
He asked me if I want to play Uber Driver, is this some new sex game or is he drunk and asking for a ride home?
It threw me off a little. I had to take a moment and ask myself, "Is he really fingering me in his mom's kitchen while I eat a whopper?"
You're the air beneath my wings and the lookout when I pee
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