i threw up on the blunt... he was pissed.
The parties out here are fucking awesome and I've got the grades to prove it.
Also pencil in smooth jazz and illegal activities. The usual.
Woke up this morning to my mom on the phone with my dad saying, "It's probably just your prostate." Reasons to move out. Go.
Just paid my credit card bill at the bar. This phone makes it so I never have to leave
Ya. I was the definition of a shit show. I woke up outside my door when my alarm went off
She's a virgin AND a minister's daughter. We're one schoolgirl outfit from the dear penthouse trifecta
he was cradling you in his arms feeding you rum straight from the bottle and you kept sucking his fingers.
do you think they make 'sorry for walking in on you drunkenly jacking of to a picture of me' cards?
I drank butter last night, who am I to judge?
Remind me in the morning that I've now seen a guy do crack. That actually happened. I'm at the wrong party.
My night has consisted of googling cat penises and creating a Tinder profile.
I woke up to Dragon Ball Z playing in Portuguese and a donut shish-kebab~ed on a dick in my face.
So much for no-infidelity-fridays....
Apparently last night I was doing back bends for the guy making my easy mac because clearly it wasn't easy enough for me.
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