apparently when i got back to tyler's i layed face down on the bed and yelled "don't hurt my asshole!"
member when we used to take shits together before volleyball games?
you guys are cousins why the FUCK are your pants off
She's Christian and monogamous. Two wammies right there. No amount of convincing will turn that bi for a night.
I'm beginning to think I'm sterile because I definitely should be pregnant by now.
we are still finding bottels filled with his pee. tom almost drank the one in the frig
I need to get a life, I am either crying at every glee episode or just wanting to blow rails off photos of us
It's surprise blowjob week. You should be excited.
In my dream, you became a famous tap-dancer. Congratulations.
when the repo soundtrack came on in the middle of us having sex i realized it was about time that i clear out my itunes library
I'll have sex with you for tacos. I don't care, man.
the hot lifeguard just pulled a McDonald's cheeseburger out of her fanny pack.
I got home and found him passed out in my tank top so i think i'll put lipstick on him and mass text a picture to everyone in his phone. that's what he gets for eating all my wheat thins
she has no right to get mad at us for drinking during the wedding. she's the one that chose the bridesmaid dresses with pockets.
I would let him fuck me right here in this laundromat. Praise Satan.
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