So im using the back of a keystone box as notecard for my presentation
she blew me in the men's room in the restaurant. it was a french bistro, so it was okay
You know, I had the money for a pregnancy test, but at the time, tacos were more important.
im hiding in a corner. drunk. with a plate of stolen jello shots. im pretty sure people are looking for me or the jello shots.
It's a special occasion. Hence the 151.
I feel like a blind man at a water park. Every step has the potential to be either fatal or lead to accidental, but totally enjoyable, sex.
Nuts. Absolutely nuts. she just screamed in my face something about not knowing whats happening and then got tackled by a dude
the lesbians just got naked and went into the ocean... this never happened when i was a camper.
Think I just subconsciously wanted a cigarette and started sleep walking to Carl's.. Didn't realize what I was doing until I found myself in an elevator.
I'm turning twenty & the only honorable way to exit my teens is by slapping the fuck outta the bag. You better be in.
You know I love you. I just don't love your penis.
I don't remember anything but bad decisions last night
On a scale of 1 to alcoholic in withdrawal how ready will you be to start drinking as soon as you arrive on campus?
Sitting naked, eating lucky charms with rain boots on
and then she asked if she could shave my junk
and howd that go?
can you pick me up from the hospital?
Randomize
