Dude you just kept yelling "She was my first asain!" right in front of her.
Picture Ja Rule and 50 Cent having a sexy full grown love child son...He's on my bus right now, wearing an outside jacket with no shirt underneath. My fashion sense and libido are fighting it out.I'll keep you posted on who wins.
Things are going great. I have tons of beer, margaritas, and theres an inflatable swan in the mix.
There were so few words spoken that I'm not sure if it was make-up or break-up sex.
The horrors my penis has endured I wouldn't wish upon any man.
Hospital. He tried giving some kid a stone cold stunner during a real fight.
I thought you should know that there is a scientific law stating that when there is booze, people talk about your dick.
The amount of alcohol I'm going to consume on my birthday is directly proportional to the amount of shit I've had to put up with this past year. Which is a lot.
How do I politely say my vagina is not a chew toy and if you bite me again I will slap you?
You could say take it easy, whoa there, be gentle, anything that doesn't fully convey the horror.
I will no longer accept being cock blocked in my own bed.
Can't you just imagine you've grudge fucked me so we can get past this?
Called my house today and my 10 year old brother answered and asked if I was still in jail
Holy shit last night was like the irresponsible Olympics for me
Woke up at my x's house. He said I talked about how much I love panda's for fourty five minutes. Then made him watch The Little Mermaid with me. Made the walk of shame infront of his mom. Things can only really go up from here.
Wait till you get home.
I made her pull the car over 5 times to puke because she was going to fast, apparently she was only going 30mph...
Randomize
