note to self: Never ask your girlfriend to have a 3some with your ex...
so we had a 20 minute conversation and created the fb page WWND (what would Nana do?) last night after we took our Ambien...that is my definition of an overachiever
only 75% of american men are circumcised...i guess this was bound to happen to me someday.
How do I tell if what I'm covered in is pee or cum?
23 Millennials Confess The Things They Wish They Weren’t Attracted To
sorry for throwing an entire water bottle of vodka at you. It was very wasteful
I wish the inside of the tampon box said "CONGRATULATIONS YOUR NOT A MOTHER!"
At least the cops kept you away from sleeping with her. Protect and Serve.
24 hours later and my vagina is still tingling. That good.
Apparently I got mad at you for "Not drinking with me till we thought we were seahorses" and smashed my face on your door. Then I put my feet in the oven and started crying because I was drinking alcohol from a pot. My life is spinning out of control.
23 Gruesome Scientific Facts That Will Make You Squirm
Its Nebraska, I'm sure im not the first person to wake up hungover in a corn field.
I thi k this dude I fcken showed up to the bar in a raisins shirts. I thought I was better than that. Fuckkkk.
All I remember is sitting on your kitchen floor and playing with a banana like it was a viking ship.
Are we going to go home and do it or do I have time to eat my nachos bell grande first?
I'm eating pizza in the bathtub
I've finally done it. I finally achieved my lifelong goal of becoming that awkward lesbian in high school who went on to have sex with more women than any of her male classmates.