we might have left him a semi topless video on his wall. godd i just hope they suspend my accont so i stop doing thses things.....
Apparently i was the first person to introduce her to her clitoris. Needless to say...they hit it off great
you just stared at your feet and said some shit about the molecules dancing and how you had just solved physics.
You were in the corner dancing by yourself yelling "I look good", when really you looked ridiculous and drunk
we just ordered 30 dollars worth of french fries...whats wrong with us?
We're listening to the crystal method and doing bong hits for jesus
How are you texting me from 1998?
What's the kids name that was drinking stale beer and redbull out of the blender?
She spent a lot of time to get her cleavage to look that good. It would be rude not to stare. It shows you are paying attention. Chicks dig that.
FUCK YOU CALIFORNIA. YOU DO NOTHING RIGHT. FIRST PROP 8 AND NOW THIS.
We were both halfway out the window trying to give each other high fives over the roof while the dude was going 150.
I was just told that i'm a premature cuddler. . . What does that even mean?
Whatever it is you failed
I JUST HAD A FLASH MEMORY OF DOING A SHOT OF WHISKEY WITH MY BEER YOU WERE SUPPOSED TO PUNCH ME IN THE FACE TO PREVENT THAT FROM HAPPENING.
6 pack came off in the shower. Sharpie is not forever.
dont know how to tell my grandparents I woke up in a frat house in the wrong town and that's why I can't see them today
Next time we smoke please remind me to put my bong back in my build a bear box. My mom says if I leave it out one more time she's keeping it for herself.
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