thanks for being my friend even though im irresponsible with my vagina
Jizz is so healthy, they should sell it at Jamba Juice. Call it "Jamba's Juice". Genius.
if you google earth my address you can see me getting out of my car. finally my moment of being famous
Even though he is humpbacked he is really good in bed.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She had her laptop open and there was microsoft word opend and all was written was "no italianoo"
i think i had a heart attack, prayed, and jizzed my pants.all at once.
I keep telling myself last night was not real, not real, not real. Then I remember I can't move. This hangover is too fucking real.
I have bruises all over from falling so much last night, I even have bruises on my arms from them picking me up off the street.. Oh vodka nights.
Roommate just came in drunk and tweaked out because my tv has a DVD player built in. Waaaaaayyyy too sober for that conversation.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Girl, that was the lost night of 2012 for me and I have buried that night deep deep away..
The silhouette of his dick looked like an eagle. Amurrican.
Why is the clock ticking so loud? Now I know how Captain Hook feels.
The zoom feature on snap chat videos is the worst thing to ever happen to sexting
I've only fucked to 2 Fleetwood Mac songs, that must be why my life feels so empty.
Im drinking a CAN of bud light at the bar. Do you really think I care anymore?
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