No idea how I passed that sobriety test.
who cares. he's ugly and has a dick this big -->
The bar is so dead the tender gave us free shots for staying. They mixed 2pac and phil collins. That's worth at least three shots.
She goes outside, smokes 2 cigarettes, and insists on walking up the 7 flights of stairs so that her heart stays in shape. this woman is crazy.
...he tried to burn down someone's house once. ABORT ABORT ABORT
he asked me to "shake his dick" when he introduced himself, playing naked football with you in our living room. $100 says you two get married one day.
Would I be bad if I bought a pregnancy test at shoppers the same time I hand in a resume? Or do you think it would get me the job?
I'm using the house around the corner that my parents rent out to people as a means of getting sex. I just tell them I'm going for a walk and just invite my next hook up over
If by "Are you drunk?" you mean "Did you just faceplant in the checkout line at Target?" the answer is yes.
Played never have I ever with high schoolers today. Needless to say they brought up threesomes so I had to make a judgement call and decided to not put my finger down
In going to go underground and live with the mole people for a while.
You are not the cause of late onset lesbianism.
Woke up in a cemetery. Puked in front a funeral ceremony that was going on.
Are you opposed to me trying out your penis?
Okay well for one he didn't speak any english but before any happened he made me use the translator to consent
Randomize
