Michelle Duggar likes to fuuuuck
Lauren will drop me off I'll be drunk ride you for a little bit and then you can go to sleep
sorry. that wasn't for you
i just realized why god gave us younger siblings....to DD for us when we come home for the summers
I can't be drunk. Sober yes. Drunk no. Spoonfuls
all i remember was you yelling "look at my little feet" at everyone on the way home from the bar.
All I'm asking for is flower occasionally, and in return you get to come home to me naked in heels. Is that to much to ask for?
I always congratulate people on their vaginal emancipation.
Ive never seen one person more proud of themselves of peeing in public and getting away with it.
They just keep looking funny at me. No one has attempted to tell me that I don't make sense though so maybe they're all way more high than I am.
I just put on my phone calendar to remind me of my final child support payment in 2029
I think I just figured out how to make weed tea in the coffeemaker.
Finding out you're not a mother on Mother's Day >>>
If it involves notarization or the Misfits, I am up to date. Anything else, I know fuck-all.
stupid neighbors doing stupid yard work with their stupid kids when i want to do drugs in the backyard
Dude we were sitting at my place stoned as fuk then someone knocks on the door and it was my neighbor giving me a huge box of cookie dough. Magic of weed.
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