I was totally willing to let her keep giving me blowjobs as long as she didn't think we were in a relationship.
When the phrase "Wow your huge" came out of her mouth I knew it was gonna be a good night.
Not even the dog will look at me anymore.
Dude she threw his clothes out n 8th floor window and her dog tried to bite his dick off. So the answer is yes it could be worse...
apparently "preggers as fuck" isn't an appropriate way to describe someone...
don't tell me about being eco-friendly. i just threw up in the same bag i bought my liquor in. RECYCLING
I just saw my first passed out person, sprawled out on the sidewalk like they died. I wanted to take a pic but I thought that screamed "tourist"
I'm not gonna lie; I was dosed with mushrooms and am eating pickles with a guy in all white. It's weird, but I'm down. Help.
You told her dad that you were gonna "superman that ho" I love the first impressions you make
Hope you don't mind if I never tell my family about you.
Also there's a home game tomorrow and I thought about holding up a sign that says, "I madeout with #64 during orientation week" would that be inappropriate??
He told me"I think your ready for this" and went into his closet whipped out a movie certiffied light saber.
One less thong to worry about.
One less *thing! But probably that too.
I plan on getting so intoxicated, that I think it's MY own birthday
Can I play this game?
I could have sworn that I went home last night... but judging from the couch I just woke up on, apparently not.
Randomize
