I bet he comes in French.
my dad just referred to me and my boobs as 'the three of you'
Banging bitches in a bar bathroom is not legit as it was in college, there are no fistpumps afterward only shame
Why do I have flashes of a dark shed in my memory?
Because we had sex in one.
He somehow managed to bang-mail me last night. I woke up this morning to a voicemail from 1:54 a.m. of moaning and screaming. I now know how talented he is and how annoying I am to have sex with.
he stopped during sex, told me i smelled like McDonald's and went harder..
Beer is acceptable at 830am if it's your bday, right?
On a better note: I'm on pace for 730 female produced orgasms in 2013.
he could've at least fucked me twice. that's just common courtesy.
Medically speaking as your gynecologist and your girlfriend, that is not a rash.
And we're breaking up
Your anal douche was on bathroom counter. Now it's in dumpster. Not ok. I am mad. Very mad.
i don't know what body building stuff he's on, but his cum is basically a 5 hour energy shot.
The fake number she gave me was for Pappa John's. Now I have a large pepperoni on the way.
I am one with the molecules
Imma do four shots of whisky within two minutes and pass out. Otherwise this'll go badly.
Randomize
