Vibrator and massage oils got stopped at security. Super.
dipping my christmas cookies in kaluha. santa would be proud.
Just met someone from Jersey. No fist pumps or jagerbombs. Kind of disappointed...
I hope my sperm were as drunk as I was.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I am the master of subtle flirting. I seduced him by simulating a hand job with an epi-pen during training.
That's cool, I just have to let the dogs out AND SO HELP ME GOD IF YOU TEXT ME BAHA MEN LYRICS WE ARE NOT FRIENDS.
want the rest of his teeth to fall out while he slowly dies alone. Pretty sure I'm to the anger phase.
He pocket texted me while I was blowing him in the car...What are the odds?
Considering how often you blow him,high.
Realistically anyone can come I don't care it's Boston what do I own boston? No. I just don't want people who are gonna give me "why are you doing that" kinda look when I take birthday shots out of my birthday babe shot glass necklace.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Its only 9:11 and I just somersaulted through a window. Its gonna be a good night
How did "just two beers for happy hour" turn into naked backyard wrestling?
No it'll be my boobs and the luge part will be from my nipples. Everyone will be sucking beer from my perfectly sculpted and partially melted tits.
i just had diarrhea that people from the 1930's would have died from
Every time we have sex, I feel his dick ramming my soul into submission. Problem is..... I LIKE THAT SHIT!
If your talking about a poncho I WANT ONE
Randomize