good call on bringing her. it's always good to invite chicks who mix booze and prescription drugs.
woke up in a garbage bag. literally. it was used as a sleeping bag.
RIP Summer 2010. God knows it had to be one of us..
All I remember is taking a bath, puking in the bath water numerous times while trying to wash myself and I must of eventually given up
Her life is filled with shit luck. Its like mother nature is having her period and just taking it out on her specifically.
After giving a back rub to someone in the bathroom of the theater, he ripped an "employees must wash hands" sign off the wall to prove that he could and proceeded to hang it up in his house.
Judging by the garbled spelling in the calendar reminders in my phone, drunk me really wanted sober me to take a pregnancy test today.
btw telling the cab driver, that took you to your booty call that is now returning your wallet that you left in his cab, that you want to hug him is awkward
Yo. What's your name again? You put "don't tell your landlord" as your name lol
Not at all! I'll let your potential employer know you have a huge dick
I mean go ahead and let your freak flag fly but if you could not fly it in my bed that would be great
honestly if there were pictures of last night i would be embarrassed.... im embarrassed without pictures
YOU ARE THE ONLY PERSON I KNOW THAT STEALTH CLEANS PEOPLE TOILETS
How did you get so drunk?
Alcohol.
Umm I might be late. Also I am may or may not have mayonnaise on my ass
Randomize
