Dude, no matter how drunk you are, it's not okay to hug every other guy at a strip club. Mainly because boners are far too common.
Just barfed in my hand. Needless to say, this day is off to a great start
found your viking helmet in the parking lot this morning, its missing a horn. There was still liquor in the remaining horn. shots from a viking helmet should be mandatory.
I swear my cock is like a magnet to my friends younger sisters mouths.
These 23 People Had Crazy Sex With Complete Strangers
ya, but you'll graduate college with a higher education. I'm looking at at least two addictions, an abortion, and a few weeks jail time.
this may be my drink champagne alone in a bbaby pool in the dark night
How's your threesome situation going?
I'm just sad for you. It sucks that the 17 douchebag asshole guys you're fucking can't morph into one nice, normal, non-alcoholic guy that has a drivers license and no criminal history.
Delivery driver perk #327: I just paid for part of the security deposit on my new place in pizza. This oughta be a fun renting experience.
23 Medical Examiners Reveal The Most Disturbing Causes Of Death They’ve Seen
Everybody shut up a minute, we need to discuss how much nicer the world would be if pants weren't a thing.
I faked more orgasms with him then ever should be allowed for someone this pretty.
His mom finally got over her shame and smoked a bowl with us. Merry Christmas to all aka me.
lesson learned. Never drop acid before a trip to the aquarium. Sounds awesome, is actually terrifying.
The guy I screamed at across the bar for booing the Bruins ended up buying me shots I had to explain to him there's not a chance in hell I would ever fuck a Canadian! #Bostonstrong
As a gentleman whose genital hole is relatively small, you could imagine my reaction