there is a ziplock bag over sangria in a wineglass in the fridge...classy?
He wouldn't know what to do with his penis even if they made a "how to get a blowjob for dummies" guide
overheard a conversation between 2 lesbians: 'back when I used to have dick sex...' oh, vegas, I so heart you
advice for life: when the cop takes your tallboy, don't ask for your coozy back
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Its official. I've reentered slutty territory. I was a condom away from having sex in a childs playhouse at a park. Oh and I lost my car keys.
ya i guess you have to take things with a grain of salt in a place where nipple clamps are the norm..
I just baptized the girl next to me. LONG LIVE THE CHURCH OF VODKA
He said I could pay him back in blow jobs. What's the going rate for those these days?
Tell Chris I said sorry for yelling "It's my vagina, let me do what I want with it!" at the party last night.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
We're keeping you on a leash this Saint Patrick's Day
I'm gonna take a crap in the portashitter like a civilized human being.
Ordered a pizza stoned. The guy handed me my pizza and I tried to pay him by handing him back the pizza.
You’re like one of those doomsday preppers, but for your vagina
Dick pics just aren’t doing it for me, this bowl of Mac n cheese and Game of Thrones trump you tenfold
she said she was so hungover this morning in a way that sounded like she was apologizing for thinking she was attracted to me last night...
Randomize