Funny thing- my attraction to each one is inversely proportional to his level of availability.
you announced to the whole room that instead of shaving you were planning to start straightening and then braiding your pubes. awkward silence followed by everyone leaving.
She has never blacked out. I have tried to get her to so many times. Apparently it's a lot harder than we make it out to be.
Hold my feet while i lean out of the window of the truck.
I guess I really am the only person in this world who can successfully have a no-strings-attached threesome on the beach.
I was very proud of myself that day. I had an awesome time. I don't care if I negatively impacted others.
And I feel like pitchers of margaritas accidentally make it down your throat a lot.
I mean, the lady at the Mexican restaurant insisted. She said she would win a prize if she sold another pitcher before noon. And plus I got to wear a sombrero
Right. Will do. I'll call you if I need a ride. (that is a double meaning, go with it.)
He ate the contents of an ashtray and didn't puke, I think he can handle drinking a fifth to himself.
In bathroom. Hand in air with cell phone. Help.
Fall is here I will miss walking downtown in nothing but paint and pasties
I woke up just like any other Wednesday. Naked on the floor, hungover and covered head to toe in lube
i just drunk stumbled into my home... to figure out that we moved 2 weeks ago..
She fucked my eyebrows.. I've never had that done before.
Wait... Plucked, or Fucked?
Fucked, but I understand your need to clarify
Now I know Sunday Funday means fucking till you loose your voice.
Randomize
