dude if Megan calls say you Sis was house sitting for me yesterday , she f'n found dana's panties
I just found 3 condoms in my math textbook... in the probability section... Under dependent and independent events...
this chick on a show just showed her boobs and let some guy paint them others asked why she did it and her reply i quote "i was bored" why dont chicks get bored more often
Drunken horseback riding is the absolute worst decision i've ever made in my life.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Found out my brother is now my eskimo brother...One of my proudest times as a brother
This girl has a second refrigerator that she uses JUST for liquor, her kitchen chairs are kegs AND she can grill. I'm not coming back.
At some point last night was I riding a garbage can.. Things are starting to come back to me
Omg calling you in 10 to update you on who I peed on last night
It just gets louder and louder too...dear god. Her poor vagina.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Nothing will ever prepare you for the moment when you are sitting on your friends bathroom floor with no pants on eating string cheese & pita at 2am.
It was like I was playing the clarinet on his penis. And I just kept saying I'm sorry.
Doap. Just bring some lube and a slingshot. Not sure y we need the slingshot.
so today, i decided to say "fuck it" to mental stability, take a klonopin and wear a blanket toga. New Girl is on Netflix, nothing could go wrong.
This is your morning-after text courtesy of your very confused friend!! :) To discuss "what the hell were you trying to tell me last night," press 1. To laugh over your drunken antics, press 2. To pretend like none of it even happened (or to respond with concurrent confusion because you have no idea), press 3.
she's the poster child for how alcoholism can be fun.
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