There was so much of it... it was like he poured a bowl of pudding on my face. It's not bad for your hair is it?
He has that cheese in a can and he's eating it. I have never seen that outside a goofy movie.
girl in front of me at starbucks just ordered 7 shots of espresso in her latte. welcome to finals week
It's not called being bisexual its called making out with anyone that has a mouth
Does it make me a prostitute if I accepted a Life House concert ticket for giving this guy head?
No. It just means your good at giving head.
we fucked while standing on a ladder. challenging, but worth it.
u r missing out we r watching a tranny direct traffic in a gstring
Just made a Xanax and ginger ale smoothie. Oh Thursday you are good to me..
You'd be surprised at the stuff my vagina tells my brain to say
Maybe just the first 2 wks of Nov can be dick detox.
fuck Derek. I choose weed. weed isn't angry and would never ask me to be someone I'm not.
THIS MOTHERFUCKING ROOSTER
IT KEEPS CHASING ME BACK IN THE HOUSE
FUCK THIS BIRD
Imagine how different my life would be if I could find a man who gave me more pleasure than pizza at 2am when I'm drunk.
Yeah I'm just gonna stay here and spread my horniness to the world.
Greetings from Florida; the armpit of the US, where my 240something lb brother nearly got carried away by some aggressive woodland mosquitoes. I was only spared because they could probably sense I was currently semi-disassociating and would not feel the suffering their presence wrought.
Anyway, how was your day?
Randomize
