She def said "you had your chance!" after telling me she had a boyfriend. Like a pile of dogshit lecturing me on how I missed out on having itself stuck to the bottom of my shoe.
bad: friday night i tripped and fell outside my dorm. worse: i just found out i broke my ankle. worst: i was shitfaced and don't remember any of this.
Id love to say been there done that but im a slutty drunk not a stupid one.
You seriously need to keep doing my sexting for me. I just said something about "riding cock like a dick rodeo"
Imagine a baby lion feeding on an injured gazelle and it tasting fresh blood for the first time. That's me and this breakfast sammich
it's like a replay of two fridays ago...except not in a motel and i'm not having sex in the shower.
I will pre answer that I did not see it the fun way. He was peeing outside.
I can pinpoint my loss of innocence as the moment I started masturbating with my teddy bears
I don't miss having sex with him. We had our finale fuck last week. He's all yours now.
You know I'm having a rough day when I'm curled up in the corner eating Spaghettios.
I am making up for a 7 year dry spell so I get a pass and I don't always care if there is a second date. It is like college but with more money and condoms.
My sister texted me to say she just found a corn on the cob in her purse from last night. You need to party with us more.
I may or may not have just let Ash Ketchum capture my wild Pikachu in a parking lot.
It's finals week and I'm halfway done with this bag of wine and don't plan on stopping. Say goodbye to my GPA
Listen, I just paid for a hotel room, so I didn't have to have sex in his car. I'm adulting successfully.
You've reached your one pic per night limit. To increase your limit, start conversations before 9 and submit your request for an additional pic before 10.
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