yeah that pretty much nipped itself in the bud when I realized i could see her whiteheads glowing in the blacklight
The only pictures he has from one of the biggest football weekends is an album titled "I miss my dog" filled with tons of pictures of his dog and him. This relationship must end.
found some acid from a couple months ago while looking through christmas lights. Looks like santa came early this year.
I'm going to fuck my way out of the friend zone if its the last thing I do
I think they called the cops after 15 minutes of you shaking their clothes line like the ultimate warrior and calling out hulk hogan
I think he offered to cook me dinner or cook me for dinner. Not really sure. Just smiled and nodded.
I still think the kiddie pool full of jello option is worth exploring. Just sayin'.
You got called a pussy at a party with a slow cooker, you can't let that shit slide
I mean, two foreign guys have drunkenly confessed their love for her, so she's clearly doing something right.
the night was just a blur of sex and pie
Starting this Monday as I always do
With a desperate plea for help
Just laying in bed, snuggling my cat, and pondering whether I'd like to attend a swingers party this evening...
One door closes, one man cooks for you through the next open door
what do you mean he's functionally heterosexual
We broke into a construction site had sex on a scissor lift and realized it was a church...tomorrow again??
Randomize
