I used to have a blog that was basically all about ****** and all of his sexual misadventures
I mean it made tucker max look like a fucking alterboy
But unfortunatley his mom did a google search and found it
Some man just said he would jack off to my hair color.
I can't remember last night. I must have yelled at your girlfriend til she cried again.
Yup.
It wasn't awkward until he started humming the Rocky theme song in the middle of fucking
All I have in my fridge is chocolate cake, pizza, spicy mayo sauce, beer, and weed. I love college
My therapist said that she thinks i may have a sex addiction. I think she may be a terrible therapist.
Want me to drive you to Dr. Drew's sex rehab?
Nah, cause then i cant masturbate to that show anymore.
Your tequila is gone. I suggest you bring more home before you go out for dinner. Money is taped to mailbox.
I had to photo shop your nipple piercings. that was extremely awkward.
Pretty sure I was high. I thought there was music coming out of my makeup bag.
Dude. I've never been with a guy who just wanted to go down on me all the time including while I'm shooting zombies on call of duty. My life is complete.
best eviction party ever.
it wasn't an eviction party you asshole, you just happened to get yourself evicted during the party.
Like the friend zone has no room for winks
I'm developing all these feelings it's disgusting.
She started throwing ice at me and started yelling, "Holy water bitches! This is an exorcism!"
When the bouncer doesn't let you in... Don't ask him where he works so you could file a complaint with the better business bureau... It only proves him right.
It's 5 PM...and you're 35. Congrats on being an amazing human being.
Randomize