u cheatin on me?
if i did i would try to upgrade babe.
just checked my call log and realized that we talked for 3 mns. what did i say for that long?
pretty standard. you have fun last night?
apparently....what exactly does 'pretty standard' mean?
typical hot then cold, followed by a death threat.
You poured sparks in your panties and NOW you're wondering why you have a UTI?
thankjk goddddn taco bell uis open htis lateee!
you do know it's eleven in the afternoon, right?
I would describe it as pure and unadulterated shock, mixed with horror and a touch of nausea.
Don't count me out just yet. Considering bartering a blowjob to see if that boy from work will take my shift.
What a great world we live in when USPS can tell you that your drugs have been delivered.
i woke up in his neighbors pool house. Not sure how I got here but there is people swimming outside. how do I escape?
just fucking run.
I feel like he better crank it up to level RG IV tomorrow. It's the fucking playoffs.
There's a chance I told a cop that I was ready for him to strip I may have even taken some ones out of my purse and stuck them in his holster
I can't thank you enough for the well-timed blowjob. What a huge improvement in my outlook on the day.
Roommate is hosting a 'sorority retreat' at our house. If you need to get laid, stumble on over.
I'm going to write a new song and call it "Did I wax my vagina for this?" remind me to never go across the country for a penis ever again.
I wonder if there is a über wall of shame that you are currently on. Like between drivers.
I'm sorry but it's something you and your A cups wouldn't understand.
Randomize
