It was like his mom forgot to breastfeed him and he was making up for lost time.
Do vagina's smell?
I mean, it really isn't YOUR car until you have sex in it.
Theyr drawing diagrams to try to explain to me how high they are
i just made mint juleps with bourbon and fresh breath strips. i am the macgyver of alcohol.
i go for whatevers easier....i'm bisexual strictly due to the convenience factor
Better than last year. I didn't wake up to an after thanksgiving human shit on my living room floor. I think it's a sign I'm growing up at almost 30.
My mascara kind of smells like tequila to me...Is this my body crying for help or asking for a shot?
Some guy in lab is humming along to a Sara Barrilles song. Or maybe I'm just hearing the song echoing in his huge, gaping vagina.
There has to be a way to make college graduation in Las Vegas different than any other Tuesday in Las Vegas. Strippers? Been there. Getting arrested for public indecency on the strip? Done that.
We are going to need a water proof camera with a flash....exit routes....lots of booze.....and a tutu for good measure
I have a bruise on dick where you tried to "high five" me.
She knew the head wasn't all that so she gave me her taco. I'm will in to give her a second chance.
Just a little drinking. So much fun and love. The world is a shiny wonderful sphere in the sky so why shouldn't we celebrate?
I'm seriously scared right now. Woke up next to 3 geese and a lot of feathers ..
Randomize
