he shaved USA in his pubs
dude i woke up in a pile of chocolate chips. this has to stop happening
my brother wants to know why there are wet balloons in his bed and i think you forgot to throw the condoms away but im too hungover to check if thats what hes talking about
I'm at the bass pro shop. They have a river full of trout and turtles, a shooting range, a full bar, and the patriots cheerleaders are here. I now understand why people are rednecks. I may never leave
I'm starting to have hip problems from having my legs spread too often.
I have hooked up with someone in EVERYONE OF MY CLASSES.
That's how you know you deserve to be a senior
say it with me now .. the "golden" penis. his nickname does not disappoint.
Just hit him with your car. I can guarantee he won't do it again.
In honor of the internet blackout, I think everyone needs to change their Facebook pictures to ones of them being blacked out.
When we pulled over so you could pee, you made us stand over you and "make a roof"
On a happier note, I can fit in my old shorts. Dope does have its perks
After she got off the phone with her mom she sprinted down the block screaming "I'M SO GOOD AT BEING A HUMAN!!!!!!!!!!!!!"
Wow I really just sharted up in this Kroger
Just found $31 in my desk drawer. In $1's. WTF happened last night?!
wait you like me?? for my personality??
I know I was surprised too
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