He finally told me that he's married. I guess it doesn't really matter.
Whenever he makes me dinner its always mini things.. cheeseburgers, corndogs.. is he preparing me for something?
non applicator tampons are so hard to put in when your drunk. i fingered myself for 10 minutes and forgot what i was trying to do.
She compares her life to Teen Mom. She's 28.
That's because you're a slut. A slut fucking a fence.
First I must say that I am disappointed to learn that you knowingly have trashy friends with whom you've not hooked me up.
We found a swing set....it's in the front yard.
I'm just gonna get real fat and join the circus.
I'm putting you on my Emergency card so i can spend the last ounce of strength in my hospital bed to flip you off.
True idk how my parents didn't know I was blackout. I ate like 4 pieces of cheesecake and showed my cousins my boobs
Well I took a spicy wing shit in a field this morning.
I air guitared a man's prosthetic leg on the bar to Bruce Springsteen. That's how it's going
It's been 12 hours since I have heard from you and social media has given me no indication you are anything but dead, so that's what I'm going with.
The uber man and I sat in silence. With my underwear in my purse and my dress shoved in the pocket of the hoodie the guy gave me.
I mean, she's batshit insane and once choked a guy with one hand but she's still MILF material in my book.
Randomize
