We're pre-gaming then going to chuck e cheese's.
If you're joking I'm going to be sad
franzia sundays are my new favorite holiday
whenever I think of his sister, I just picture a chick with a huge beard
A freshman just referred to Home Improvement as 'tim the tool man show'. People born after 1990 are not people.
dude, she was giving me a lapdance and her thong had a skid mark. no I did not hit it.
How can people commit suicide when things like bagels exist
I feel like I'm sitting in a sleigh of puddy. It's not a bathtub though because you need a sleigh to go down a mountain.
I just really need to get the matching flask to go with my pill box. Is this another step towards rock bottom?
Ultimate Fighter Idea. You and I both have unprotected sex with the same girl in the spam of days. Whoever the child belongs to, wins and that child is the ultimate ultimate fighter.
How high are you?
I have a 16 minute video of you talking about your life. We are calling it your Anthology sponsored by Steel Reserve
Whenever I'm not in the mood and don't want to go to bed swampy, I just strategically suck him off during the second period intermission of the Cup playoffs and he leaves me alone and does the dishes. It's a win-win.
We need a fire pit. Meat. And a keg.I mean like a cow we just carve from. And cook it. We can use the milk from the udder to make White Russians
I'm about to be a GTA V widow, he could at least throw me a bone. Literally.
So we were in bed when his brother walks in, walks over to me, fist bumps me and says he just wanted to say hi, then leaves...so random lmao
Dude. You dropped to your knees and face planted into the rocks. And continued to talk on the phone and laugh. That's where those cuts came from.
Randomize
