sooooo how many boyfriends is too many?
I've come to the conclusion that as a grad student I would much rather prefer to get laid then get drunk
I think you know full well that a few years ago my stance was the polar opposite
I feel like after all he sees, the dog needs to get baptized.
You could have chosen coming to fuck me over getting too hammered to drive. But you made your bed, and now you get to jack off alone in it.
Best part of being a cop: When I showed up at Thanksgiving with stitches in my head I could tell them I was "protecting and serving" not "drinking and falling down". Career validated.
Im cutting you off tonight ONE boy at a time
Thats like me asking what you think of antisocial polish guys with mysterious rashes
So as a result of a tragic manscaping accident I've had to shave all the hair off of my legs. The result is... not great
just woke up and currently drinking copious amounts of eggnog straight from the carton to replenish the electrolytes lost last night
There is a dude riding on one of those standing wheel things inside forever 21. Calm down.
how much of this shit do i need to take before i think its a good idea to set the house on fire and scream satanic mantras?
At one point in the night, as we were running from the cops, I clearly remember you yelling "little gnomes are tickling the insides of my body!" ...that high.
I just don't understand why we can't have sex in the house. I'll come see you but I'll have to think about the barn thing.
Someone drank my pedialite!
YOU drank your pedialite. I watched you chase shots with it!
In the last 2 hours I managed to have romantic starlit sex on the beach as the tide came in with not only just a gorgeous man, but one who happens to be Eastern European and finishing Harvard law school.
Oh wow. I want to be you right now.
Randomize
