I'm trying this new thing, it's called standards
sometimes i shoot so far i amaze even myself.
i love my job...i have craft hour at my desk w twizzlers
can u grab me a application
you never know, standards drop, they turn gay, shit happens.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just got head while drinking hot cocoa and eating cookies. Never in my life have I felt more like santa claus
yeah but it's new years. they should arrest people for being sober that day.
I'm sober enough to question why I have your name as "the wolverine" in my phone.
No, the weekend was great. It was the waking up in the pond in the raft without an oar that sucked. That fucking water is cold at 7am.
when the repo soundtrack came on in the middle of us having sex i realized it was about time that i clear out my itunes library
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
yeah, never be friends with someone with shitty eyebrows.. they obviously already make poor life choices
I couldn't really understand you because you were really quiet and I said "I don't know what you're saying, it's kind of a big mumble" and you said "that sums up my life"
I HAD TO PAY A COVER FOR THE FIRST TIME LAST NIGHT. My tits didn't get me in and I was so pissed.
We kicked down a door together last night, pretty sure that qualifies us as best friends.
There were a lot of gay moments in between the Strippers and coke
Will exercising make me less horny?
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