Once you see the odd facial expressions and noises a guy makes while he is furiously beating off on top of you, it kind of puts things into perspective.
i must have dtf stamped on my forehead
i'm sending her a home depot gift card for the hole i put in her wall. call it good?
before tonight, i was terrified of what tequila would make me do. but all it did was make me hook up with a movie star. sooo basically tequila's my new fave
It's amazing how much better one feels once you put something in your vagina.
i feel like god sat there all night pointing and laughing at me
i'm surprised you didn't wake up. like i literally came when he was fingering me as i was spooning with you and all you did was mumble "that's a good idea, mom" and pull the sheets away from me.
So I just saw Jonah Hill at LAX and decided my fat fetish is back
You should go to counseling for that
Your lack of great college experience of margaritas and foam parties scares me
My god. His mom just smacked my ass. Does this mean I'm accepted??
Just casually ripping a bowl in the chicken coop, with the chickens. NBD
And then he serenaded me with "Pimps don't cry" from 'The Other Guys'. If that's not love I'm not sure what is
In the ER with Chelz, I may have broken her ankle during sex. Lovely.
You're right. I woke up today with my ugly sweater still on and no pants. I'd say it was a successful night.
He puked all over the side of the car and the head rest behind him...and then all he said was "America."
Randomize
