i need a penis for penetration, you wont do.
oh yeah... my b.
what did you hear about me?
that you are a very nice girl and a pleasure to be around
that was hard to say and not laugh
My body isn't even mad at me...just disappointed
Interesting preview of what next year will be like. Side note, missing a chunk of flesh from my middle finger.
We are not buying weed off a guy from the internet.
Well, it's hard to say. Last night he puked a perfect circle around him on the floor, and then sat in it insisting it would protect him from the smoke monster. He's was still there last time I checked.
I just passed a truck with its bed lined with a tarp and filled with water with six dudes chilling in the back driving through campus. That looks fun.
Sorry, fell into some ass. Call you tomorrow.
We accept all of your sexual lovers, Jewish, episcopalian, atheist. Dick is dick
I don't want his dick, I want his flame thrower!!
Pretty sure one of my drivers stopped to get laid while he was delivering a pizza. Is it appropriate to give him a write-up AND a high-five?
This is the second time this month a hookup cried when I left...bro get your shit together bar does NOT equal wife 😬
The cat ate a weed mint. This is not a drill
last time we were there you stole a tap from the toilets. How are you confused that your bag is full of baubles you clearly can't stop collecting their furnishings
I just want a guy who makes lots of money, has a skilled penis and the sex drive of a 22 year on Viagra. Is that too much to ask?
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