I would like to feed your fingertips to the wolverines.
I had it in my eyebrows, my bangs, under one eye, and across both cheeks. Congratulations on the successful and elusive warpaint cumshot.
fter the third song from an iPod commercial played I realized how much that frat sucked.
I NEED TO NOT REMEMBER THIS IN THE MORNING. He is our TEACHER.
I'm pretty sure he's lost all respect for me. it probably happened somewhere around the time i had officially slept with every single one of his friends..
I thought 4 percs were too many but I'm dumping Gogurt on apple pie and taking giant bong rips. This feels right.
Seriously-without actually meaning the statement for it's words- that made me want to put a baby in you.
And now I'm drinking leftover wine in the grad lounge because fuck my life
Hey, you remember years ago when you told me you would give me a kidney?
Totally clawed myself in the face during sex. I can die happy?
I'm pretty sure that our Lady and The Tramp Red Vine moment was the farthest I got last night
Good, I would never sleep with your boyfriend , or send you an edible arangment
Hey! How are you feeling? Still preferring soup over sex?
I woke up to the smell of shame and vomit in my hair... went to the bathroom to shower and passed out... woke back up naked with the blow dryer on... thanks for making my birthday a success
i’n just gonna forge ahead, gag reflex be DAMNED.
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