omg. I had the wrong window open and I accidentaly posted my credit card # on twitter
Whats your twitter name
You cheat on me once, shame on me. You cheat on me with a white girl, it's fucking over
she just asked me to help her create a twitter page for edward cullen's hair.... seriously.
i was the DD for the swedish students tonight. Got paid 23 dollars for driving 10 miles. gotta love ignorance and the confusion conversion brings.
he doesnt exactly give off the "im mature enough to use my penis" vibe
So... he formspringed me a link to every nude pic ive taken since he 8th grade. ive evolved nicely. but im nervous as to how this a website.
I knew he cared when I got his text "happy birthday to the girl who gives phenomenal head"
Just found my bra in a bag of chips on the kayak floating about the pond. Sure sign of a good night
I took her to the bar and boom. All of my past slump busters were there. Shes cool enough to know what that means and said she was afraid they'd eat her so we left.
rigging a system to keep my jello shots cold in class. important election day work.
I was stalking his twitter and saw that he used punctuation in a hashtag. Thank god we didn't work out because I can't be with someone that incompetent
He came over apologized for his lack of sexual skills. Cleaned my kitchen cooked me dinner. And gave me another one minute stand. I think im okay with this
In fairness you've introduced me to a lot of people I've only met once, for like 5 seconds, while drunk
I also have bagel bites. I know that's not as big an incentive as the cocksucking but.....
I'm waiting for your stupid pizza and this 400 lb drunk man is behind me singing the acapella version of Elevation by U2
Randomize
