is it a bad sign that i now think of my run-ins with cops as "skill building seminars"?
um, yeah. i think it is.
can't decide if i want to get drunk or coked for this harry potter thing.. it is kind of long
aren't you going with children?
Just had to have the guy at Sprint clear the dried cum out of the trackball on my Blackberry. Wonder if that happens to him often.
So I'm probably the first guy in history to tap out of a blowjob.
So many bounce houses so little time
She keeps stunt undies in her bag, 2 sizes too small. She leaves them behind so the guy thinks he was luckier than he was...
It looks alright. The blow up doll is in the microwave, and she has forks in her ass
Why were you having sex on top of my left over pizza in the kitchen?
I'm babysitting my fucking roommate he took out the screen and is trying to throw dishware in our fucking pool after he repelled off our balcony
there's a photo set of like seven dicks covered in glitter....i don't know what to do
When that bartender tried to tell us he sang like Sade, I knew it was time to go
He's got a beautiful penis, I can't lie
Sooo, did you delete me cause I said I wouldn't babysit you while you did shrooms? You're a grown man.
within five minutes of being here her dog found my vibrator in my bedroom and was carrying it around all proud! and her mom is here. so embarrassing :(
Well, not only did I find out the Top Knight has roof access, I also let a guy I just met eat me out on the roof. Seems like a lot of wins if you ask me.
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