direct quote: "i'm so over my clit" either best or most awkward conversation possible with your COUSIN
You really need to get over the whole "jail" thing. Its really not that bad.
Freshman Move In Day, its like Christmas in August.
Dude, how the hell did you become an RA?
Call me as soon as you're able to dial a phone. I just took a shit behind a building in broad daylight and need to get the fuck outta here soon.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I know. he thinks we're 'meant to be'. No we're fucking not. God wouldn't give my soulmate a pencil dick.
Was there a Canadian at your party or did I dream that?
I am drinking green tea.... My liver is in shock
Last night was so embarrassing. I got like almost blackout drunk and threw up in my hand and then blamed it on someone else.
I'm not taking advice from anyone I've seen passed out naked at noon on the hood of a strangers car. Meaning you.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
My boobs are numb because I've been using them as stress balls
I woke up at 3:30 this morning to pee. Luckily, I didn't have to travel far as I was asleep in my CLOSET on my yoga mat. Good news is I had a pillow...
who says I'm not relevant to the kids today? Just had snapchat sex, blows the roof off aim cyber sex
1st date with cop went weird. He yelled at me & we had a horrible date. Walking to the car I tripped & started bleeding & then he made out with me. Is it wrong that I want to see him again?
THIS IS WHY YOU NEED THERAPY!
You kept running around yelling "I need my pajamas" & then you got naked. Shit just went downhill from there.
I gave in, made out with her, and long story short, I'm giving hetero another try.
Randomize