i woke up under my mattress pad with him laying naked next to me and his wwjd bracelet on my nightstand.
nice, that's exactly what jesus would do.
He just asked me if his big had a curved penis. Awkward? I think so.
dont try to nair your balls. i speak from experience
idk whats worse playing power hour to yourself, or the fact that you were having fun while doing it
We had sex in the tent after his 6th beer and while we were at it we had conversations with the people outside the tent.
I know. My only sports are biking to buy drugs and running from the police.
The last bar we left there was a sausage stand right outside and I apparently felt bad those guys were working that late, so I bought a $9 sausage, gave it to some drunk kid and said "I support local businesses!!" I'd say I've done my civic duty.
Don't feel bad, we're professionals and we just housed burgers in burger king singing I believe I can fly
Chilling. The soap was talking at one point if I rememeber right...
I guess I'm open to more types of dick now
I've drank literally 19 beers and am still good. Utah is worthless
I knew my bag made it because I could smell the fireball that spilled inside of my suitcase before it was on the luggage carousel.
Its official... I need to stop being so slutty.. the guy I had sex with on friday delivered my jimmy johns tonight.
We should buy t shirt guns and blow eggs out of them at his house. Bachelorette party
BABE I MISS YOU SO MUCH LIKE THE SADNESS OVERWHELMS BONER ABILITY
Randomize
