we were having sex in the shower and he dropped me. try explaining THAT to your concerned little brother
so tomorrow. i'm thinking coinstar then adderall?
All we had was a keg so we played edward nalgene-hands
it wasnt like "sexy" or whatever. like...she was smiling just standing there butt ass naked
tasteful.
this is not okay. even my mom refers to me as a sorostitute.
It's not my fault. Someone keeps buying me tequila shots. Idk who. But every time I look down there's another. I think there's a conspiracy.
But i don't feel like talking to him right now. I woke up an hour ago to a picture of his penis and I AM NOT A MORNING PERSON.
We're trying to decide between cracker barrel an the ER
I feel the need to send all my exes pictures of penises larger than theirs. Because they all must suffer.
But that background check said 51...Omg. If I hooked up with someone that's my dads age.....
I pulled a muscle last night drunk dirty snapchatting him
They were supposed to legalize it when there was a chance someone might actually propose to me. I'm appealing this bullshit.
So you're not opposed to us ever having sex again? Because it just seems like such a waste to let a penis like yours go.
I just made the most “single life” Amazon order ever: protein bars and condoms.
Instead of.being an intelligent and mature adult and dealing with my feelings I chose to get hammered and fuck flounder
Eh it happens
Randomize
