I like how you formally end text interactions, just turn your phone off or don't respond you pervert
Paul doesn't remember going to the bar and slept on someone's porch...doesn't know whose porch...maybe near Howard U.
The brown eye won't let me do that either.
Finally jerked of with a banana peel.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
so when I got there he was dressed as jesus in a recliner drinking whiskey out of the bottle watching spanish porn. Then kept shouting dont judge me or ill judge you. we didn't even go to a halloween party.
Just did shots with my boss to warm up for our sales call to Childrens Hospital. I love startups.
She introduced herself and then asked "have you ever fucked a girl with a cast?"
as he left, i held up my fist and said "pound it out" and he was like "are you serious, we just had sex..."
I had to close one eye to read the questions on my final this morning. That hungover.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Just woke up next to our cab driver from last night. Please tell me this isn't happening.
I just don't understand how a line to ride a camel on a college campus could be too long for you to wait in.
They glued all of the ceiling tiles shut.
oh my god. you caused complete remodeling to a college campus that you don't even go to
How do I explain the handcuffs and tanning goggles on our living room floor? There's rope too. The cats love the rope.
I want to fuck the side burns off of Steve.
I'm too depressed to masturbate. This election is the worst.
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