I ahte it when I peed a little on my shews. I got a litll bit on the automen in your room too.:/
Tracy!! I don't have an ottoman in my room.
Ohhh....do you have a dog shaped liek un automan?
i really wish facebook had an app for when you are looking at a chick's photo album, you could just skip to the ones where she and/or her friends are dressed like skanks
4 words: hood of his car
Wow anytime a scalper has i need tix written on the back of a franzia box thats a trusted seller
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Uh, do you remember who's thong is in my tree?
Yea you just drank all the Hookah water, then started talking gibberish about the Kool Aid you just drank.
How can I not totally like a guy that told me my boobs were too big for me to be taught how to play golf?
I drew a nude short fat middle aged woman today and liked it
It was honestly one of my favorite days in art class except for the 20 min she faced me and kept looking at me and we made eye contact
The band last night was really good
That was definitely karaoke. Guess that answers my follow up question on how drunk you were.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I have work in an hour and I'm having trouble with concepts such as 'staying upright' and 'staying conscious'. Tie me to your wrist next time we go out drinking,
Definitely thought about throwing up in the cat box since it's not as far to the bathroom..
Will you remind me I changed my hotspot phone password to fuckyouprivilegedwhitedude
I woke up in bed spooning a vacuum cleaner
Definitely accidentally brought drugs into Disneyland. Considering using them.
I knew I wanted to marry her when we got in that bar fight and she full-nelsoned a guy while I worked his kidneys. I knew then we had to breed
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