I dont kno what was worse. Waking up 2 a guy next to me thinking I got blackout or realizing it was your boyfriend.
And Anthony pissed on himself at the strip club
We need to either start getting drunk more often or one of us need to start doin drugs
Wtf? Why?
I want awesome conversations to show the world.
i go for whatevers easier....i'm bisexual strictly due to the convenience factor
Well if were past the bullshitting stage yes if not then no I'm not that kind of guy
The cab driver doesn't know where we can find an empire state building shaped dildo either!? What is wrong with NYC!?
Found a grenade pin. Still no Dave.
Just had the best idea EVER: start a mead brewing/dispensery business! WE CAN BREW IT IN MY GIANT CLOSET, AND NEVER BE SOBER AGAIN.
When you were bringing him upstairs I told him to bring you on down to pound town. you're welcome.
I offered to lick your vagina while wearing a suit... Pretty sure chivalry is well alive.
I may have just poured a honey apple beer onto a dried apple slice to rehydrate it. This is my day.
i definitely signed you up to receive text message notifications from a jukebox last night. Not even sorry.
Get here now. I need a drinking buddy. I don't care if you're in a different timezone, it'll be five o clock here faster.
My mom is worried I'm not eating enough protein so she's sending me 48 cans of tuna. That's not a typo.
She woke up, mumbled "the trees" When i asked her what about them, she yelled "WE NEED THEM FOR OXYGEN," Then went back to sleep.
We need to get on her level.
Randomize
