Is it weird i consider You Sexy Thing our song?
if you don't let us come over today i'm not taking the second plan b pill. your call.
i just jacked off to lindsey vonn, i feel so patriotic
USA! USA! USA!
we're tailgating intramural basketball with hard drugs and tequila...and i think the players are taking shrooms
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm not throwing down for dinner because I plan to have so much tequila I puke it up anyways. How much is a cab home?
Her only article of clothing is an American Flag
I got to the party and found your shoes in a bag of Funyuns. You weren't even there.
You kept running up to married couples, taking their pictures and begging for them not to get divorced
although steph and I had 3 bottles of wine by that point and watched an opera that featured a black dildo so anything was possible really
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Update: that felon in Georgia I slept with is now a police officer. What a wonderful world
I did my patriotic duty. I woke up next to a veteran this morning.
His new girl is probably classy and boring. I bet she doesn't feed him sour patch kids while she wiggles his weiner.
Everyone has seen your nipples. It's like asking if they ever walked on grass. You need better hangover questions.
I will literally have glitter in my crotch for weeks.
Is it good porn? Or is it more of that fucked up Cabbage Patch Doll porn you made us watch
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