I don't think your that much of a whore. your like a whore-let. a mini whore.
how do you spell 'special'? like slow?
S P E L L C H E C K
No you dumbass thats not right
he said my vag tasted like ravioli n pennies... i forgot I was on my period
You said you were collecting Asians for your Kate Gosselin costume.
We really need to check into harvesting part of our liver now
He's dressed as a power ranger handing out cocaine
Almost told my boss I was an expert aat swallowing when he questioned my ability to take excedrin,xanax, and a vitamin all at once. It was a medicinal gang bang lubricated by arizona tea.
Apparently, Mom was less-than-happy about us shotgunning beers before we opened presents.
but they dont look like handprints. looks like someone had a boxing match with my tits and my tits lost
I just sent a bad sext to my sister. There's not even a way to damage control this, is there?
Woke up with 5 texts apologizing from a number I named "guy who elbowed me in face"
how do you make "fuck me in the break room" sound casual?
My roommate is fucking his gf in the shower and i really have to pee do i just bust in or pee on his bed
How was it?
Incredible. Everyone in the world should be having the kind of sex I've been having.
He should write a pamphlet or something...
I'm sorry I walked in on you guys, but all I heard from outside was her screaming "Dive, dive!". Sex was my last guess for what was going on in there.
Randomize
