real busy. everything is packed. thats why we ended up at the strip club
I fukin lobve the states. Girls here let me fuck them because they like my accent. I may not go back
So I have the professor convinced that the textbook will take another week to deliver. that should give me enough time to replace the cash i spent on strippers.
I keep telling girls I work at the carnival and then guessing their weights. I'm pretty sure I'm about to get kicked out.
Have you ever chugged beers in the hospital parking garage with your mom?
you were stumbling down richmond carrying a girl in a nurse costume. its not even halloween dude
Kristy just reminded me that I have a bottle of champagne to lick off your ass hole...... This is by way of saying that we have plans on Friday.
I was worried he'd break you after the hiatus your lady parts had to take from social interaction.
Romantically speaking, I want to sit on his face.
I had sex on the roof of the dorm last night ... I feel like a combination of spiderman and van wilder
The three yr old girl I nanny grabbed a pole just now and is chanting "this is my house"
Sounds like you at that dive bar last weekend
I woke up with what appeared to be LSD in my pocket. Know anything about this?
Wound up hungover. Visiting 4 y/o nephew suggested cookies and milk and playing Kirby with him with the sound down. This kid is going places.
He's a fucking ninja- think of the things he can probably do with his dick.
I was drunk in the shower and i decided to shave. Im now bleeding to death
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