New. Vanessa hudgens nude pics
That text made me feel like i signed up for some awesome celeb nude pic reminder
Also, on a completely related note, just came up with an awesome business plan. You in?
i think i should save myself the $200 for a prom dress. i mean why bother. its just going to be covered in vodka/jizz/and puke by the end of the night.
I just found out my favorite drunk show, Repo Men, is just reenactments. I can't express through words my disappointment.
found a pic of my little bro & his girl naked. he got the brains and the huge junk gene. I hate him
just drew up plans to mow my front lawn into the American flag for world cup. that high and patriotic.
Of course I lose my iPhone but still manage to hold on to the ruler for my dirty teacher costume
I woke up with her dog licking the wedding cake out of my ear and her sister finishing our Jaeger
I literally paid cover, got kicked out. Tried to explain that I was just clumsy, but mispronounced it. Then I got pissed off, stormed out..and clotheslined myself on a velvet rope. How was your night?
Immediately after sex he layed on the floor and acted like my yellow bra was pac man
My neighbor is burning all of her ex's things in a metal drum outside the window. Guess who's going to make a new friend?
Sexy intern needs to have caveman sex with me
I volunteer to be the person who breaks into the room and runs around naked and has to be escorted out by police.
aloe plants are like gummy bears with an exoskeleton, but with healing powers instead of deliciousness.
are you on the drugs???
I have mystery bruises on my right knee, right arm, under my chin, and on my forehead. What the fuck happened last night??
The gift for sixth anniversary is steel. He bought me handcuffs. Inee I married the right man!
Randomize