I just found that girl ____ on facebook, her activities include "church nursery" yikes
Thats something to write home to mom about
Dear Mom, I had sex last nt w a girl that liked to b choked. Im n love. Cant wait for you to meet her
Who would have guessed that ordering a vodka lemonade at Roscoe's was code for I want a hand job
and honestly a story about how you met your future husband that DOESN'T include the words "creeped him on facebook" is really not a story worth sharing
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I don't know where my bra went.
Welll you ran into the street, took it off and yelled "I'm a free woman!". And then you threw it at some homeless guy.
I think he just gave me the 'I used to fuck your sister' discount
I was so high I thought there were pigeons in my room. Long story short there are now donut crumbs all around my bedroom.
it was really awkward meeting your mom for the first time while i was still wearing the condom we were using.
I performed "get broken glass out of my shoulder" surgery last night... Drunk, with a what-a-burger straw.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
That makes the second boyfriend of hers that I've fucked. I'm gonna start keeping an eye on every guy she even speaks to. Girl is my sexual rabbit's foot.
I think online classes were designed around the concept of day drinking.
well... I just junk punched a carnie. Doesnt matter how, it still counts for my bucket list.
Wait, whatever happened to locking our vaginas in closets?
Fuck you and your fucking taquito's.
Im drinking a CAN of bud light at the bar. Do you really think I care anymore?
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