wait, do i give off the impression that i DON'T want girls to show me their boobs if i video chat with them?
I saw your purple underwear in the road this morning.
She looks makes a Zellweger face when she cums, she's keeps asking why I call her renee
We should have cut you off when you asked the can driver if you could ride in the trunk.
BAHHAHHAHHAHAHHA SOME ASS IS BIYING NE DRHBKS. DRUBK
Sorry I was drunk and left blood all over your back seat I was pretending to be in private Rayan and used your thong as a bandage
Sorry I dragged you across a parking lot
Why yes. I did get laid looking like that. My sheets look like there was a clown orgy
we just smoked for like ten hours and got froyo. not a bad start to the weekend.
Now that it's over, I can finally say it and not feel bad,dude. Her mustache is better than yours.
I may or may not of seen my high school physics teacher making out with my old high school boyfriend at the bar last night
His dick is a spiritual experience and meditation is very important to me.
did you call me last night and say you were being kidnapped?
Plus my parents would be pissed if I spent Thanksgiving in jail... again.
We had sex in Lake Michigan for an hour Sunday.
Thanks for ruining an entire lake for me. I hate you so much right now.
Randomize
